IT WAS ONLY A GAME

My nieces and nephew came back this weekend and we decided to go for a bowling game again. Being very young, they don't score much. What a waste of money! Naaaah... althought the ball usually ends up in the gutter, they always enjoy bowling and it is a pleasure to make them happy. They are adorable. So we went - the 5 of us including 2 nieces who are still too young to play but they usually will roam around, climbing and busy themselves with all sorts of activities in the room.

We were playing as usual and this time, they scored well. For the first throw, Adam scored 9 which was excellent for a boy his age, 8 yrs old. So we played and I can see everyone showing better performance than before. Suddenly this man (in his 50's i would guess) who was playing next to us with his friends told me to make sure that the children do not distract them - they are having a match. I looked at the man and smile. I can't say anything but feeling sorry for him. His words were not good - the way he said it did not show any compassion towards children. At his age, I expect something better than that. Well, I know we made a mistake but we are talking about kids here, come on!

How many of us have this passion for children. We need to love them.. teach them things they don't know. If we teach them well, they'll grow up to be fine men and women. They are our hopes - our future. Even the prophet would let his grandson climb his back and horse him around. How passionate he was with children. He always show his affection towards children. He would kiss them, comb their hair with his fingcers, play with them and most of all, he enjoyed having them around. If we don't have love for them, who will they turn to for love? Once you establish the love and affection, it is easy to teach them out of trust and respect.

The man reported us to the manager and we were asked to change lane with someone else, with our perminssion of course. We don't mind - had to play a whole new game again. The children followed my instruction and I told them to have patience. My niece was furious because her score was better before. This time around, we played with less spirit. The balls ended in the gutter more often than before. It is not fair to deprive the children from their rights of having fun. They continue playing for the sake of filling the empty slots with some scores - mostly 0. I believe those mature man who were having their match were acting selfish. We looked at them with dissatisfaction.. I watched them play from afar. Before throwing the ball, some would look further down the lane at the pins as if they were going to swallow them. I saw all sorts of style and the throws were quite powerful compared to ours - my niece's ball would go straight at first but as it approaches the pins, it loses its momentum and....(I don't think I have to finish my sentence). They were serious. For myself, I it doesn't really matter. If the ball ends up in the gutter, I don't have to worry. I don't mind and my team won't mind either. We were there to have fun. To us, it was only a game.

I was just wondering, "If people can be so serious in a game, can they not be serious in seeking Allah's pleasure?"

Allaah says:
“And turn in repentance and in obedience with true Faith (Islamic Monotheism) to your Lord and submit to Him (in Islam), before the torment comes upon you, then you will not be helped. And follow the best of that which is sent downto you from your Lord (i.e. this Qur’an, do what it orders you to do and keep away from what it forbids), before the torment comes on you suddenly while you perceive not.” (Az-Zumar 39:54-55).

SOMETHING GREAT IS COMING THIS WAY ;-)

I wanted to continue with my series of lecture on THE GLORY OF ISLAM - ISLAM IS REVIVING when they asked me to talk about RAMADHAN instead. So last night I looked through the books, browsing the internet to get legitimate facts from reliable references so that I won't be blamed for incorrect teaching. Early this morning, I felt energetic when I was delivering although I was feeling quite anxious before that. I felt like I wanted to talk about everything that had been researched but alas, time was so short. I can only brief them about the preparations of the great month of Ramadhan.


It is really true that when you deliver your messages, you are the one who benefit the most. I feel different today.. so scared that I cannot do what i had preached. Good eh? This is why we have to talk about Islam all the time.. to revive the spirit in our hearts so that our iman will not decrease. I learn from my Hadith class that truly Iman can decrease with the decrease of AMAL, your acts of worship. How good it is to feel that we are close to God. I hope in the month of Ramadhan, I can feel closer to Him. Oh..how I long for Ramadhan but at the same time, I am not sure whether or not I am ready for it. I don't want Ramadhan to go without Allah forgiving me. Please Allah.. do help me!!!

The analogy of the coming and going of Ramadhan is like going to Mecca - the holy land where one is so fortunate to be able to get multi-folds of rewards for any good deeds. So when you are in Mecca, you do lots of acts of worship because you know this is the holy land and you have to maximize or optimize your time. Such a lovely place where you concentrate only in your worship, very little concern of the dunia, Masya'Allah. I remember when I was in the bus leaving the holy land.. my eyes cannot stop looking at the direction of Kaaba while my heart was crying - longing and longing to be there again. It is like departing with your lover and not knowing when you will see each other again.. Subhanallah, such a blessed land that took my heart away. I remember once I wrote an article.. "I left my heart in San Francisco"... sorry, no more San Francisco. My heart was there.. at the very holy land. You just can't describe how beautiful it is to be there. The first time I laid my eyes on the Kaaba, I was.... there is no word to describe. It was so different. It was not like those great glamorous building that people build to impress others - not at all. It was just a normal square thing.. but masya'Allah, when you look at it, all your emotions come together.. you feel the longing, the love, the pleasure, the mercy, the compassion.. aah!!! There is no one word but only SUBHANALLAH - praise be to Allah, lord of the worlds.

Ramadhan is like that.. to be in Ramadhan is fortunate. There is no counting how much reward Allah is preparing for us.. but are we prepared? Are we ready to collect the points? We all want to be victorious when Ramadhan leaves us.. ya, it is not us leaving Ramadhan..but Ramadhan will come and leaves us. But don't let it go without getting mercy, forgiveness and release from the hellfire. Indeed, if we want to be victorious.. we need to be serious about it like increasing our voluntary prayers, charity and protecting ourself from doing maksiat (bad deeds). Evil or bad deeds darken the hearts. How unfortunate if our hearts are dark.. na'uzubillah. O Allah, please help us to purify ourselves..to strengthen our hearts in piety. O Allah please help us to help ourselves. Help us to help others too.

One interesting thing that I had experience recently was meeting with my new Sheikh. I have a new Sheikh now.. I feel happy that Allah is sending someone to us. O Allah, You are great and I am so grateful to you. We met at a nearby mosque, he gave a talk on IKHLAS. I wanted to meet him and I waited until only selected few remained. We gathered around him and everyone took their turns to take pictures and to hug him. Of course, I had to keep my distance as they were all men there. But I stayed with them. Then when I had the chance, I introduce myself.. he called me DR. Such a polite and well-mannered man. He reminds me of Sheikh Abdullah Yassin.. the way he speaks - very proper and careful, Subhanallah.

Then I was thinking.. it is not easy to be them.. the knowledgeable people, especially when you are really well-known and having lots of fan. I make doa that he will not change.. May Allah keep him on His straight path... let him deliver his knowledge with humbleness like he always does, let him be merciful too - aproachable and respectable. O Allah, these are the people who can help us.. to guide us, to set an example for us..please O Allah. We need them.. and please ease our path in seeking the knowledge of the religion. Help us to increase our piety and forgive us for what we know not.

Talking about having fans. I read about Saidina Ali r.a. who would say this when he was praised "O Allah, please forgive me for what they know not, please make me better than what they said about me, and please don't blame me for their thoughts on me". This doa is beautiful and I believe those people who are knowledgeble, they are wise people too. They are only seeking Allah's mercy and compassion. So praises don't leave marks in their hearts. May Allah help them in their effort to revive Islam, ameen.

Rasulullah said, "O Muslims! Fear Allah and obey Him. I give you glad tidings as the month of Ramadhan is approaching. This is the month in which the Qur’aan was revealed as a guidance for mankind, as well as a clarification and differentiation between truth and falsehood".

And as Ramadhan is approaching, I am feeling hopeful - as if I am going to Macca when I think of the bounties. I will be there, insya'Allah and the reward is tremendous.. and I am smiling because something great is coming this way...... Subhanallah, YOU ARE GREAT!!!

Missing you, Princess....

I kissed you and let you go. This time was not like before. I was sad because you came back for only 3 weeks - shorter than planned. I waved at you and there you were, rushing through the crowds to get to your boarding gate. My mind crawled back to 20 some years and realised how fast time moves - my chidren, they are leading their own lives. Now you are already almost in your final year, getting ready for your career.

This time I feel like it was a dream, having you at home. 3 weeks was very short - so many things were left unsaid and no time to do what we have planned before. Allah knows best. But we managed to do our family portrait, although without your sister. It was alright.

People do change through time. You do too. I can see that you are stronger and louder in your words and actions. You are full of determination and very confident. I love you, my princess and my prayers are with you always. I pray that your journey is well. I know you'll feel the same when you reach Leeds - When you wake up tomorrow, you will feel like it was all a dream. Nice dream eh? I know I will take some time to readjust myself to not having you home. After a few days, I'l be alright and you will be back to your daily schedule. Insya'Allah, we'll meet again. Perhaps we'll meet again when it snows ;-)

All the best, my princess... be strong like you always do!

Good bye, My beloved sister!

Saying goodbye is never easy. Let alone saying it for good... to someone who is close to you... a sister.

It was yesterday, Wednesday night, May 26, when the sad news came to me. My elder sister passed away, leaving 6 children – she was the 4th in the family. There were 9 of us.. now, only 8 left. I watched the proceedings and all those while, I was saying to myself.. this is the end of us. What are we searching for in life?? Comfort? Wealth? Position? Power? All those will be left behind.. leaving you with the white cloth wraped around your naked stiffed body.

I watched her laying there…there was only white coverings...all tightly wrapped. It felt sad .. I remember her smile.. her laughter.. her jokes..... her eyes... We were close. We were like buddies when we were young. She used to bring me my lunch box when I was in secondary school. She was always helpful, generous, happy, kind… as a child, she was very adventurous..I must say. She was in a play once in a big hall in our town .. her role was a troublesome tomboy….I think she loved that role.. I still remember that day.. she wore the red jeans! I wore the jeans when it fitted me years later.

We shared many great moments together - good and bad too. There were too many memories.. they all rushed into my head as I watched her… I miss her so much. We have not seen each other that much. I was very busy with my work.. she stopped working for sometime due to her deteriorating health. Knowing that too didn’t caused me to visit her that often.. There were so many things I wished I had done for her..

The night when she passed away.. I was thinking of her. She usually call just to say ‘hi’. Perhaps she was thinking of us before she went. We were all there… all 8 of us and our mom. I don’t know how my mom felt. Her sadness must be different than ours. When I looked at the children, I can’t help myself feeling sorry for them.. but Allah is most Merciful Most Kind.. who are we to feel sorry… They have gone through a lot. Their father passed away 4 years ago. I was in UK then. When we were leaving the house, the youngest, 8 years old, cried… he must have felt insecure.. not having his mom around. I wrapped my arms around him but I don’t know what to say.. I can’t say that everything will be alright… as it won’t for sometime. He had to deal with the fact that his mom will not be there anymore. They were very close .. I remember the time when I visited them.. he did the ”story-telling” in front of us.. his mom was coaching him – looking proud at her youngest son. Abdullah is indeed a smart boy with bright eyes and cheeky smile. Then I rewarded him and he was so happy.

I watched the end of my sister… when the soil were flattened and there was no sign of her anymore. The ‘talkin’ was recited and we listened with our hearts. We were told the meaning of life.. that everything was just temporary and the ultimate, is our Lord. Her name was called upon to tell her what was expected to happen…but indeed the note was meant for us. We waited there until everything was over. That was indeed the end of a person - a sister whom I loved so much- Hamidah. As I stepped away from her grave, my mind was with her.. what was in store for her.. She was indeed a kind and generous person but still, she must be scared, being left alone there without her family around.. we can't do anything but pray..

‘O Allah, forgive and have mercy upon her, excuse her and pardon her, and make honorable her reception. Expand her entry, and cleanse her with water, snow, and ice, and purify her of sin as a white robe is purified of filth. Exchange her home for a better home, and her family for a better family, and her spouse for a better spouse. Admit her into the Garden, protect her from the punishment of the grave and the torment of the Fire.’

‘O Allah, forgive our living and our dead, those present and those absent, our young and our old, our males and our females. O Allah, whom amongst us You keep alive, then let such a life be upon Islam, and whom amongst us You take unto Yourself, then let such a death be upon faith. O Allah, do not deprive us of her reward and do not let us stray after her’.

‘O Allah, my sister, Hamidah is under Your care and protection so protect her from the trial of the grave and torment of the Fire. Indeed You are merciful and truthful. Forgive and have mercy upon her, surely You are The Oft-Forgiving, The Most-Merciful’.

As I recited my doa while leaving, my tears were rolling down my cheeks. I had to say good bye ... I love you, sis and will always do. You will always be in my heart, insya’Allah.




The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says,'Surely the heart rusts like iron.' People inquired, 'How can it be polished?' He (s.a.w.s.) said, 'By remembering death and with the recitation of Quran.' (Nahjul Fasahah)
“…verily, the death from which you run away, will, surely, overtake you & will send you back to the Knower of the visible & invisible things & He will then inform you of what you used to do.” (Q. 62:8)

Amir's Birthday again.....

A few weeks back, you wrote a poem about your Swansea friends... I know you still miss them and thought that they are irreplaceable. To you, Liam will always be your best friend. I know Swansea to you is home sweet home. But open your heart.. you might find some more kindred spirits around! It is not so bad here...

Today is your 14th birthday – I have too many things to say to you but I don’t want to exhaust you…Today is a significant mark in your life – I believe all birthdays are good markings of our lives as they are indicators of opportunities Allah gives us to improve ourselves – more time, insya’Allah. As a mother, I always have my hopes and anxiety, watching my children grow especially at their tender young age can be exhausting but rewarding, of course. During these years, you should set your path…where you want to go and where you would like to be. For the unfortunates, Allah put barriers in their hearts where they cannot see what is right and what is wrong due to their own doings and their stubbornness to accept Allah’s commands. May Allah select us to be among those whom Allah loves and guides.

My son, Amir,
I wish you Happy Birthday! This year, you are no longer in an Islamic school – no more SMIH. That doesn’t mean we are bringing you up as a secular person – never! I know I should not take you away from that school but that was what you wanted, perhaps you don't like the idea of being away from us! I guess we don’t have any choice as I watched you getting depress and exhausted. I am doing my best to keep you safe and prepare you for a better future. There is nothing I would like to have more than to have my son understands Islam - be a knowledgeable person, have good influence and a role model for those your age.

When I look at your friends at SMIH, I know they are indeed your good friends. I am glad we celebrated your birthday again with them… Let me recap their advices when I asked them to say something to you. They said, Amir….
o Watch your prayers as they are pillars of Islam. Without them, you will collapse.
o Don’t forget your Duha prayers… (I remember how you used to call me around 11 to check whether or not I have done my Duha)
o Do your supplementary fasting… at least 3 days a month if not, Mondays and Fridays (you tried your very best to do your fasting every Monday and Friday.. I was afraid you might not be strong enough but you were).
o Do your Qiam (night prayer) as it takes you closer to Allah. I also remember when you were home last year, sometimes you would ask me to wake you up for night prayers)
o Be careful when you befriend girls… when there are only the two of you, the third is the devil. (I remember how you would always talk about this hadith… wala takrabuzzina….and tell me how your ustaz always reminds you all of the danger of it) .
o Obey your parents, be kind to them.. as they always want good things for you. (A few months at SMIH, you were showing a lot of progress.. you were very careful when you talk to me.. you were so gentle and obedient – I don’t mean you are no longer obedient but it is incredible how fast the improvements were).
o Be kind with people… in the class, do not disturb others. Always mind your manners.
o Most importantly, read the Quran a lot and learn Hadith as they provide guidance in our lives. Read and understand them and you’ll be safe. (When you came home from your hostel, you would ask me to read the arab style.. the right way of reading, you said).

I am sure you remember these advices. I hope these boys will always stay as your friends because I like them and I know they are the circles of friends you’ll be safe with… I know you miss SMIH but you hide it from me.

Amir, I don’t know what to plan for you now… I have so many ideas but time is against me… Going to a nearer school, you are always tired when you reach home. Perhaps the weather or may be because you feel lonely - there's only the three of us at home now. Please let me help you explore your potential because I know you are special. Please let me assist you to not waste your time like kids your age do – too much internet and TV are not good. I will help you if you let me… I love you and want the best for you, my son. Happy Birthday, love! May this year be filled with joy and happiness… and some kindred spirits to share them with you too….find good friends, my son! Always find good friends!

Mama

KNOCK! KNOCK!

5:30 am. There was a knock on the door. It's half an hour to Suboh and it's pounding hard. “It's time for tahajjud!”, it seems to say. Are you still sleeping when Allah promises at this hour that He will be there waiting for your prayers, awaiting you to beg Him….. and yet, you are still sleeping? Don’t you have enough sleep already? How many hours do you need? 8? You're such a baby… Coochy Coochy!! Up baby Up!!

Sleeping time is over! Don’t you know that Umar Abd Aziz, a pious leader of Islam spent his nights crying and praying to Allah in the middle of the night, – fear that he had not done enough within his power for the people under his leadership? In fact, he spent 200 rakaat everyday for solat nafil – just for the supplementary solat. Wasn’t that great? Shouldn’t we not fear of our commitments – that we have not given enough? We are still lazy to stand for prayers. And our prayers are full of thoughts, all the worldly affairs. With this, how can we stand tall in front of Him and his beloved prophet? Have we taste the sweetness of Iman that solat is the best time of the day and that we are always looking forward to talk to God?

Can we ever stand tall? What should we say… what can be our excuses? That the world is not like before! All these sophisticated technology – it is not suitable to apply Islamic values or sunnah! Our parents have not taught enough! Schools did not provide good Islamic education! Leaders were selfish and corrupted – blame them! We were busy with our responsibilities at work – they couldn’t do without us! Our boss gave us too much tasks that not only we had to spend so much time in the office, we had to bring them home! That the traffic was too much…by the time we reach home, prayer time was over! Can we not list 100 more excuses? Want me to go on? Oh my... can I not use these excuses?

So what is our stand? Are we ready for tahajjud? Are we not scared that we will be in these dark rooms underneath when none can help – not even our Mercedes, not our big screen LCD TV, not our fully decorated house, not our newly renovated kitchen, not our collectibles handbags, shoes .. or whatever baggage we have with us. None can help except our good deeds that we left – those good deeds that we thought was good for nothing… the food to the needy that kept them sleeping at night because their stomach aren’t empty like before, the help to a friend that took ages of our precious time but kept him smiling all day, those money donated to the orphans that worry us because the savings were lessen, the unneeded clothes to the earth-quake victims the kept them warm when they have lost their shelter and help tidy up our wardrobe…. and yet, you thought they were unrewarded! So all these can help lighten up our dark rooms – they won’t be dark anymore but in fact, they can be “gardens of delights”.

When I read the last poem by Imam Al-Ghazali, it motivates me – gives me hope that death can be beautiful, that we would be able to converse with the saints, that we would be able to rest from all these worldly affairs that tire us, a sleep prolonged…that death is life that surpasses all that we can dream of here. We should not be frightened when we think of Allah’s mercy and love because the ultimate happiness of our being is when we get to meet Him, our Lord, face to face. Subhanalllah!

Tahajjud is important for our souls – it is a must for those who want to have close relation with Allah. This is the time to converse with Him… softly. This is the time to beg Him, plead with him. Do you know that if you do it often enough, if one day you overslept, the angles will wake you up because he misses you?
 So what are you waiting for???

Knock! Knock! Is that the angle?

Allah Ta'ala says, addressing the prophet (pbuh), "O you wrapped in a cloth, Stand (in prayer) by night except a portion, half of it or a little less, or a little more, and recite the Quraan in measured tones. Soon shall we send down to you a weighty message. Truly the rising by night is most potent for governing the soul, and most effective in speech [of praises and prayer]. [73:1-6]

Congratulations, DOCTOR!

Dec 26, 1983 - You were born when it was snowing. I had a female doctor, Dr. Mayder and the delivery process went smooth (Epidural Block). The next day, we took you home and it was very cold and snowing still – you were in your pink outfit, wrapped in a blanket – we still kept it with us. Being very young at that time, it was a whole new experience to us, a whole new horizon to explore.

While others were busy hanging out with friends, going shopping or do what youngsters that age like to do, there we were, busy with our new schedule as young parents to a newly born baby. Of course, it was not easy. I remember at night, I hold you on my shoulder, hugging you and missing my own parents. I want them to see how beautiful you were, we did it all – changing diapers, cleaning you up, dressing you – adhering to your needs. You looked so fragile but we were brave. We did everything we could for you, using God given parenting-instinct, I guess.

We watched you closely as you grow. Your first word (‘baba’), your first smile, your first laughter, your first steps…. remember how easy your dad made you laugh – and we made you repeatedly giggled and we recorded your laughter. You took your first few steps at the age of 10 months. We took you everywhere – there are times when we took you in the baby cradle to the computer lab so that I can do my assignment, we took you to the library, we took you shopping for groceries (usually around 2 or 3 am), laundry… almost everywhere except to our classes. We had to arrange our schedule so that one of us can sit with you. Well, we sometimes, got help from our friends…Alhamdulillah.

When we ride in the car, you used to sit at the back in the middle of the back seat on the armrest. That was your favourite spot. You were so easy to handle – sorry, I made you sound like a tool – but really, you were never difficult. When you were a bit older, in the morning, you used to wake me up and asked me for breakfast using your own sign language (Being a young mother and a student too, I need my sleep ;) ). So I would take the milk and breakfast cereal out from the fridge and you ate on your own. I still can picture you eating your breakfast in the hall… you did it all on your own. At times, you took the cereal by yourself and you were very independent. How amazing! I also used to shop for your clothes a lot. The dresses for girls your age were very cheap back then – usually at K-Mart, they have the occasional ‘blue-light’ sale especially end of summer.... I bought your dresses for only $1 or 50 cent each.. so I bought lots of them. I remember you used to wear new and beautiful outfit each day. Oh.. how we pamper you so much!

By the time we had to go back to Malaysia, you were already 2 ½ year old. You enjoyed the plane ride. We still have a picture of you looking over the airplane window in amazement. You wore the pink dress, pink overcoat, and a pink hat. We still have the outfit kept too… You did not like Malaysia, at first. I can tell. For the first few weeks, you can’t put on your shirt because it was too warm. Somehow, at that age, you can’t talk … but my dad was wonderful.. every morning, at the breakfast table, he would teach you to pronounce just about everything… so he made you repeat after him and one of the first words he taught you were ‘air’ (water)… you can’t say it at first. You said - a-yo. He made you repeat the same thing everyday and we saw the rapid progress. You started with one word and then you start building up sentences.. and before we know it, you were talking in less than 6 months.

It was funny when early in the morning, you would take your lunch box, put on your favourite blue gown with ‘smoking’ design and waited for the bus to pick you up. You saw my youngest sister and the neighbour’s children were picked up by the school bus and you thought they would also pick you up. You sat there in front of the house on your blue lunch box and waited there until there were no school busses passing by. Then you cried because they did not pick you up. How long ago that was… my youngest sister is already married with 4 children!

We travelled a lot… especially during the festivals or holidays. You and your sister once travelled with my friend and at that time, both of you were 8 and 6 years old. But already you both knew how to do jama’ and qasar . They were amazed. Yes, you were bright and very well-mannered. You set good examples to others. Knowing these qualities in you, I recommended you to be a ‘prefect’ at school. I wrote a letter to your teacher – I don’t think if you knew that. But these are the things parents do for their children, assisting them to become leaders. You did well at school – straight ‘A’s and we were proud. Allah is Most Kind, Most Merciful.

Those days were long gone. You went to University and learn Medicine. It was tough. I remember when you were doing your International Bachelorette program, you were all stressed out. We could see your struggle and Alhamdulillah, you passed and we were relieved. We were quite anxious but we were sure, Allah knows what is best for you. After your 2nd year in University, you came home to us in Swansea. You were upset. You blamed me for pushing you to Medical School. I don’t think I did. I guess it was an obvious choice for an 'A' student like yourself. So you wanted to change and do something else. But it was too late – with the contract, I don’t think we can afford to pay back. Your years in college were like sailing in the open sea. Sometimes, the sea is calm whilst most of the time, there are waves, at different scales. Despite all that, Alhamdulillah… many fishermen survive the waves and so did you. I believe the ocean helps us to grow and become stronger…. learn to be patient as the waves come and go, thanking Allah for His mercy in good and bad times, helping others to stay on-board together, and the most important thing is that the ocean helps us to realize that we are nothing but Allah’s creation… however good we are, we still need Allah’s blessings and grace to stay alive.


So there you are…. graduated and we are happy and proud (Baba, Yana and Amir too). I know you are going to have a tough life despite all the struggle that you had gone through. I thought all mothers would be happy if their child’s a doctor. My good friend in Swansea, Sunny said that she doesn’t want her daughter to do medicine or any tough courses because she wants her to have an easy life…. I felt terrible. What have I done? Her words make sense – but it is not wrong to be ambitious, of course! My mom and dad – they must be so proud of you. My dad used to talk to my neighbour’s daughter (she was around 6 yrs old at that time) about what she wants to become. She told him that she wanted to be a doctor. They talked about her future… how it would be like to be a doctor. He used to praise her and was proud of that little girl. And indeed, she is now, a doctor.

Why I wrote this? I wanted you to know of your childhood. Of what we think of you and that we are so proud. Having you is a bless to any parents. Tomorrow will be your first day at the hospital as a DOCTOR and I want you to know that even at difficult times, Allah is there helping you out.

I remember there was one time when I was so sad (it was during my PhD – don’t know if I told you this) and I cried so much. I locked myself in Liyana’s room – there were papers around me. I took those papers and start rearranging them. Suddenly, I saw this phrase written on a paper like it was sent to me there and then…it says, “why are you so sad? Don’t you know that Allah is with you all the time?” Subhanallah… I can’t believe my eyes! I believe Allah send messages to us only that we sometimes are too busy to notice. So do not forget to make dua that you will be able to pass through the days with a smile on your face. I don’t know what your days gonna be like but however difficult it was, you shouldn’t feel sad. Remember for every muslim, there is no grieve nor fear. And Allah promised - with every difficulty, there is easy. Indeed, with every difficulty, there is ease. For us who have faith in Him, we keep our spirit high and hope for the best. May Allah help you to step forward with bravery with a new motivation to help others who needs you. I know there are many of them! So.. be brave, kak long. We are supporting you all the way….. CONGRATULATIONS, DOCTOR! I love you all the same.


CHAYYOOOOOKK!!
mama

“Whoever submits his whole self to God, and is a doer of good, has grasped indeed the most trustworthy handhold; and with God rests the End and Decision of all affairs (Luqman: 22)